LOVE which are usually far from boring) , but that it leaves me “too busy” to take care of myself. This usually leads to some kind of burnout at best (in the form of extreme fatigue and a case of the doldrums) or overt sickness if I’m less fortunate. As I’ve began carving out more time for myself over the past few years, I’m so much happier, healthier and productive on a day to day basis. And that is something I believe is worth passing along!
My old self-care strategy involved waiting until I’d reached total burnout to give myself some love and generally involved spending a weekend on the couch watching TV or a week in bed fighting a sinus infection. In the short term, I did get better and refreshed, but all the while, I felt antsy, like I should be doing something else and then as soon as I was better or my funky feelings had passed, I went right back to my old patterns and 2-3 months later I was sick or depressed again. Not a great way to live my life. I was constantly frustrated by this pattern which left me feeling as if I was moving backwards and not towards my personal goals, which I so desired.
Just for the record, my self-love strategy is far from perfect now, but it has improved a lot. I recognize the symptoms of the path to burnout much sooner and as a result am sick far less often and feel like I spend 90-95% of my time moving forward towards my goals. Not bad!
In my personal journey, I have found that the best strategy for self-love involves daily, weekly, monthly, and longer term practices. Daily self-love practices alone just don’t pack as much punch and longer term practices resemble my old pattern a little too much for my personal satisfaction.
Daily Self-Care
I find that daily self-care is definitely the most challenging to follow through with. Balancing my fitness practice with my acting career and my personal life often seems to leave little time for myself. The times when I’m most successful with daily self-care practice also relate to the times when I’m most productive in my career, am most happy, and feel most balanced.
Here are some of my favorite daily self-care practices (I don’t practice all of these everyday. I change them from time.) :
- Starting and/or ending my day with journaling. I found that if I set a certain amount of time for this practice – even if it is just 5 minutes, the routine of it was tremendously self-satisfying.
- Meditation. My favorite way to meditate is through Holosync technology. Introduced to me by the owners of Acting Success Now, Michelle and Robert Colt, I listen to recordings of binaural beats which help me reach a deepened meditative state.
- Keeping a gratitude journal. At the end of the day, I write down 3 things I’m grateful for. No repeats. It’s amazing how centering and awesome it can be to discover over time how much you have to be grateful for!
- Stretching and/or using a foam roller or other self-myofascial release tools. I generally take 5-15 minutes to do this. Sometimes first thing in the morning and other times, first thing when I arrive home from my day. As both a performer and fitness professional, I place high demands on my body on a daily basis. Stretching and self-myofascial release help me ward of chronic pain and tightness, address imbalances in my body, and better meet the demands of my work.
- Preparing my daily fresh juice or smoothie. Now that I primarily juice vs. drinking smoothies, this is an even bigger gift to myself. The process of washing and prepping my vegetables, making the juice and cleaning the juice can take up to 20 minutes, but my body is very grateful for this care.
- Reading for pleasure. I’m no slouch when it comes to reading – but most of my reading ends up being for career development, either as an actor or as a fitness professional. Taking the time to read for fun is a tremendous gift to myself.
Weekly Self-Care Practices
Weekly Self-Care is one of my best tools for getting through a very hectic week. My weekly self-care involves the following practices:
- Non-work related exercise. Exercise that doesn’t involve taking a dance class, or research on “new” methods to bring to my students. My favorite workouts recently have been Physique 57 and running. I try to schedule 2-3 of these workouts that are exclusively for me per week. These are designed to be fun for me. So even if you don’t have to workout for work, you can make a special effort to choose workouts that are highly enjoyable and not on your list of shoulds.
- Menu planning and shopping. Success in eating well for me has a lot to do with time and access. Although it can feel like a lot to pre-plan my menus (including lunches and dinners) all at once, when I do I am far more successful at eating well throughout the week. I rarely find myself eating a bit of this and a bit of that when I’m home because I have enough groceries on hand to satisfy my true hunger. It actually saves time and money too, because when I’ve pre-planned and pack my lunches, I don’t have to take precious time looking for healthy foods when I’m out and spend less on a day to day basis.
- Self-grooming and pampering.This one’s kind of new and hard for me to keep up with because it seems to take so much time and I’ve never been much of a girly-girl. Some things I put under this category include doing my nails, plucking my eyebrows, taking a bath, doing a towel scrub, and other seemingly luxurious beauty treatments.
Monthly and Beyond
- Planning short and long vacations. Since my schedule currently doesn’t allow me 2 days off per week, like most people, I instead make sure to plan a 3 day weekend at least every 2 months and a vacation of one week or more at least twice a year. This gives me valuable time to refresh, spend time with my husband, and gives me things to look forward to, which helps me stay motivated towards my next goal.
- Planning personal or artist-dates for myself. These are times that I schedule either to go away on my own or spend time alone in the great city that I live in when I will not work. Whether I go to a show or a movie, a museum, or spend the day creating a piece of wearable self-expression with my sewing machine, these are also vital for a personal refresher and are an excellent reminder when I’m not being creative enough in my daily life to reconnect to those instincts.
How to Get Started
If you are just getting started with better self-care, it is important to start small and keep things in perspective. Until it becomes a habit (which for me seems like a life-long process), it is not unusual to feel like there is no way to find time for these kinds of activities in our lives.
Begin with one thing that strikes your fancy (and don’t feel limited to the ideas I have shared with you here!). Implement one aspect of daily self-care for 21 days at least before trying to add something else – trying to add too much too quickly will just leave you feeling overwhelmed (a feeling we are actually trying to limit with self-care not add to!). If you forget or skip a day, no sense beating yourself up over it, just get back to it tomorrow. Treating yourself with compassion when making big changes to your life will reap infinite rewards!
I would love to hear how you are implementing self-care in your life! Leave a comment below to let me know what your favorite self-love practices are and your process in making them part of a regular fabric of your life.
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